“I shouldn’t be surprised that the one time I’m in his city, the brute doesn’t even show up. I suppose whatever hate we had has fizzled and the reason why I’m here is pointless, I don’t really have business in here, do I? I suppose this is the fate of a used and broken doll.” The informant didn’t really have any reason as to why he had been in Ikebukuro, searching for the blond, waiting for his name to be roared out like the beast he was searching for. He kept trying to convince himself he was here to gather information on someone, but that wasn’t true. In fact no one had asked him for any information lately, so perhaps everything was coming back to him as Karma. Shinra had once told him, back in high school, that karma would come back to bite him.
i don’t expect anyone to but…why not…
I’m sorry if this comes off rude to the people who have messages me…
Trembling hands slammed down on the keyboard, icy shivers running through the raven’s body as he tried to focus even while his vision started to haze in and out of focus. It was loud enough, and a big enough commotion to draw his secretaries attention to him. The brunette stared at him, watching him as Izaya gave her a glare, rubbing at his nose and sniffling. He knew he was going to have to give her an excuse, if she asked that is, he just found himself lucky enough - fortunate enough to be blackmailing her as well as the fact that she didn’t usually question what illegitimate activities he’d been planning or doing then. He could feel his whole body quaking, feeling a cold sweat run down his back, almost soaking through his shirt. He unlocked a drawer next to him, heaving the key out of the lock harshly before wrenching the drawer open with so much force that it almost dropped onto the floor.
Hunting around in the drawer, he found what he was looking for and crashed the drawer shut, cramming the key inside the minute lock and making sure he locked it, that he didn’t leave it unlocked for Namie to delve through, god knows that woman liked to meddle. He took the keys with him, not giving her a chance to check the drawer for its contents before taking the other items with him, quickly making it up the steps to the second floor, slamming into the bathroom and locking the door behind him.
His whole body shuddered in eagerness, in necessity, in longing and need. Just that next hit, it helped him get through each day. He was almost surprised that Shinra hadn’t picked up on it, but then again he had stopped seeing Shinra the second this habit had kicked in. He licked his lips, suddenly dry and his mouth now lacking of saliva. He hands shook, fingers fumbling as he got the straw, and the container. He managed to get the container open, dumping a small pile onto the untouched white countertops of the bathroom.
He didn’t - couldn’t- look at himself in the mirror as he grabbed one of the razorblades he used for ‘shaving’, using the thin blade to smooth and separate the white powder into neat, little lines- the sound of his wheezing breath and the sound of the razor making clicking and scraping sounds against the countertop were the only things that he heard. He groped with the straw, almost dropping it down the sink’s drain before he bent down, placing the straw up his nose as he placed the other end at the strip of white powder.
With a snort-like inhale, the powder quickly travelled up the plastic straw, sticking to the inside of his nasal cavity to where it would soak into the sensitive skin there and give him the high he so desired, he so needed and wanted now. Nothing could compare.
He repeated the process once more, twice more, a third time before he swept whatever he didn’t get back into the bag, making sure to tap the straw for good measure too. He licked his lips, now finding that he had saliva in his mouth, making his lips damp as he stared at himself in the mirror this time, auburn eyes dilated, cheeks reddened and shining. The sweat that had seemed to stick to him and seep from every little pore and crevice in his body almost seemed to have vanished as soon as he took that first hit of the inebriating drug.
He was still huddled over the sink, and his shoulders shook in a light chuckle, watching himself in the mirror. It was the reason he was like this. He honestly could not remember when this habit had started, nor did he sincerely care at the moment. He waited in there for an instant, waiting for the first hit to calm him more, to make his pupils seem more normal, not that Namie ever really looked him in the eyes all that much, but she did and that was a concern. If it looked like he was hopped up on something, she might ask for something that he normally wouldn’t do. His eyes narrowed. He had to be very guarded around her since she was the one that was around more often the not when he needed his hit.
He took a deep breath; let it out before he stuffed the bag somewhere inside the bathroom where he knew Namie wouldn’t look for it, a place he would remember so that he could lock it in the drawer later. But as soon as his phone rang, signalling that it was Shiki messaging him, he decided it would be best to take it with him. Who knows when he would need his next hit anyways? He also didn’t want to risk Namie looking in his bathroom and finding it. The brunette woman was usually only concerned on if it would take a toll on her paycheck, but the fact that Izaya was sprung up on cocaine might cause her to be a bit more concerned than usual. That was something he couldn’t afford.
The head of the Awakusu-kai left him a text with the information that he needed, and Izaya smiled in a twisted way that would almost have anyone’s skin crawling. If one didn’t know any better, they might think he was a psychopath on the rampage, just looking for his next victim to skin alive. He grinned wider and easily slipped out of the bathroom, grabbing his fur-trimmed jacket on the way down.
”Namie-san~ I’ll be checking out Ikebukuro for the day. No one dissatisfies Shiki-san!” He easily moved through the two leveled loft, slipping out the door as he said the words. The brunette woman sighed and just continued working; it was nearing the end of her shift anyways, so she didn’t really care.
Once he stepped past the boundary, the imperceptible boundary he might add, and stepped into Ikebukuro, he took a deep breath, inhaling the pungent air that combined the two cities. He grinned that same unnerving smile again, but frowned when he felt a slight tremble in his hands. Maybe it hadn’t been enough this time? He could handle it for now, he needed to complete the job and if he couldn’t focus even just a little bit, and he would be a lot worse for wear then he already was. Izaya was currently glad for the foundation and cover up that he had purchased. It hid the bags and wrinkles his face and accumulated since he had started.
The raven had barely even gotten half-way into Ikebukuro when he heard the familiar reverberation of the famous monster of Ikebukuro. He grinned once more, waiting for the blond to find him. It certainly didn’t take him long since it always seemed as if he had an uncanny sense of smell. “I have business here, today, Shizu-chan! I’m sorry I can’t play!” And with that, he took off running.
He ran up and down alleys, spreading his scent everywhere he could, it wasn’t until he felt so out of breath, his legs and hands and fingers trembling so badly coupled with the blurred vision he was experiencing, he knew that the run with Shizuo had taken that small little hit right out of him. Once more, he trembled with the bag, fumbling it open with his clumsy fingers. He didn’t bother using the razor since he didn’t intend to snort it up on the dirty, wet pavement that crunched under his feet with loose rocks and cement as well as loosened foundation from the old buildings around him.
He shuddered at the thought for a moment, cringing at it before he repeated the process he had done not even a half hour ago. His breath shuddered out, and he tilted his head back, licking his dry lips before dipping his head down again, snorting the white powder once more. He swallowed thickly, almost unable to swallow anything until the drug slowly started to kick in, the active agents in it making his head swim- made him feel slightly… giddy. It wasn’t until he heard footsteps behind him that he whirled around, auburn colored eyes going almost comically wide when he noticed the blond at the end of the alley.
He mentally cursed himself for his foolishness, for thinking the blond wouldn’t find him. He clutched the bag tight, trying to hide it and the straw even as he couldn’t help but rub at his nose, sniffling and repeating the action of rubbing at his nose. It was as if something was bugging his nose, but there was nothing there. His heart rate picked up, the thrill of the chase there stimulating him. But what he didn’t expect was for the other to simply stalk right up to him and grab the arm that held the white powder.
Eyes almost comically wide once more, he didn’t know how to react, he couldn’t even think of reaching into his other pocket with his good hand and lashing out at the blond with his switchblade. Instead, he stood fixated to the spot, not even struggling as the blond inspected the package, almost seeming to know what it was by just looking at it.
Why won’t you
T E L L M E,
If it’s ME that you love,
Or just the thrill of the chase.
Do you love me?
Am I a real person to you? Or am I just an
A N I M A L? I am your willing P R E Y.